lasso a ghost

i think i need to swallow dirt   fly face first into brittle grass   smash in my teeth   smile and dig   i used to run for miles   climb to turquoise waterfalls   set my body on fire   i used to read past midnight   scribble sagas    slip far inside    return with lungs clenched in my fist   weave words between my ribs   and wonder    sometime in the past decade i was robbed of all my focus    combusted under the weight of dripping summers and lack of touch    of hot wired glass that knows what i think before i do   my endurance eroded by unanswered prayers   now i lay me down to sleep   dear lord how do i lasso a ghost?   bury a sign behind my skull   so clear i cannot miss it   slam me back into myself    i press the heels of my palms in my eyes   fall through burnt wine and white lightning veins    nausea-bitten dreamscape   open up rinsed fever   i wonder   inching closer to paradise